this week is already a blur.
lots of work because of the short week, getting everything ready for thanksgiving and meghan's birthday party, going to disney to celebrate her birthday. it's a bit of a whirlwind.
add to that, i've been sick and wake up every morning with my head feeling like it's going to explode. my face hurts so bad that my teeth hurt. gotta love sinus infections.
add to that, meghan is having trouble at night. she has suddenly become acutely aware that bad things happen. last night, as her little lip was quivering and her voice was shaking, she told me that she didn't want anything bad to happen because she will never see me again.
just re-hashing it now makes me want to cry all over again.
and it's partly because it's true. bad things do happen to good people. and sometimes you don't get to see people that you love ever again.
but then the morning comes, and the clouds look like a fluffy, cozy blanket in the sky with the warm sun shining through, and all is right. sometimes you just need the light. and we needed the light today.
i have been dreading her losing innocence and it has come. every day, i notice that she's just a little more grown up, a little more aware of reality. it's just more fun to live in fantasy, which is why i love disney so much.
so this week, when we are all running around like crazy, trying to make everything perfect for the various parties and thanksgiving meals and visiting people we love, i want to take a moment to stop. to breathe it all in, slowly and remember that it's just about being thankful.
last night as i was trying to comfort meghan while she was scared, she said to me that santa brought me her for christmas because i wanted someone just like her. and my god, was she right. it is fitting that she is a thanksgiving baby, because for her, i will always be eternally grateful and thankful.
and it is good.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
11.19.10
1. i am grateful for nice weather.
2. i am grateful for yoda keeping me warm while i'm shivering under the covers at night.
3. i am grateful for birthdays. my girl has one more year until she reaches the 5 year old "no longer classified as a preemie" age. i will cry in gratitude.
4. i am grateful for my girl singing christmas songs on the way to school this morning. oh, how she loves christmas. and so do i.
5. i am grateful for weekends. even though i have a lot to do, it's still not being at work.
2. i am grateful for yoda keeping me warm while i'm shivering under the covers at night.
3. i am grateful for birthdays. my girl has one more year until she reaches the 5 year old "no longer classified as a preemie" age. i will cry in gratitude.
4. i am grateful for my girl singing christmas songs on the way to school this morning. oh, how she loves christmas. and so do i.
5. i am grateful for weekends. even though i have a lot to do, it's still not being at work.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Monday, November 8, 2010
i need this today
1. i am grateful for nice weather.
2. i am grateful for my gorgeous girl and the time we spend together.
3. i am grateful for a devoted husband whom i drive crazy.
4. i am grateful for meditation and the peace it brings me.
5. i am grateful for starting over. it's never too late........
2. i am grateful for my gorgeous girl and the time we spend together.
3. i am grateful for a devoted husband whom i drive crazy.
4. i am grateful for meditation and the peace it brings me.
5. i am grateful for starting over. it's never too late........
Monday, October 11, 2010
little known facts
random things people may not know about me...
...i prefer sunrise to sunset.
...i have more than one blog.
...i never planned on having children, ever.
...i eat pop-tarts in stages (crust first, peel off the back, lick out center, eat back, then yummy frosted top)
...i have a ridiculous constant craving for roasted okra dipped in ketchup.
...my favorite candy is peanut butter m&m's but i will only eat them frozen.
...i do not write the letter "r" lowercase - ever. in fact, i was docked points on a handwritten essay for it in college. and i refused to re-do it.
...i hate talking on the phone.
...i think i was a chef or baker in another life.
...i tried to change my major in college from psychology to physical therapy but couldn't because of the schedule.
...my favorite ride ever is sheikra at busch gardens.
...i think that the way i feel when i ride sheikra is what heaven must be like. at least i hope so.
...i am terrified of scary movies because i find real life too scary as it is.
...every time an aspca commercial comes in, i lunge for the remote to change the channel or i will cry.
...which is odd, because i usually only cry when i'm really mad.
...i prefer sunrise to sunset.
...i have more than one blog.
...i never planned on having children, ever.
...i eat pop-tarts in stages (crust first, peel off the back, lick out center, eat back, then yummy frosted top)
...i have a ridiculous constant craving for roasted okra dipped in ketchup.
...my favorite candy is peanut butter m&m's but i will only eat them frozen.
...i do not write the letter "r" lowercase - ever. in fact, i was docked points on a handwritten essay for it in college. and i refused to re-do it.
...i hate talking on the phone.
...i think i was a chef or baker in another life.
...i tried to change my major in college from psychology to physical therapy but couldn't because of the schedule.
...my favorite ride ever is sheikra at busch gardens.
...i think that the way i feel when i ride sheikra is what heaven must be like. at least i hope so.
...i am terrified of scary movies because i find real life too scary as it is.
...every time an aspca commercial comes in, i lunge for the remote to change the channel or i will cry.
...which is odd, because i usually only cry when i'm really mad.
Friday, October 8, 2010
you
my girl.
these pictures are the definition of you.
you are: beautiful, unbelievably strong, happy, stubborn, determined, strong-willed, smart, sarcastic, silly, hilarious, a fighter, a survivor, an old soul, tempermental, opinionated, witty, outgoing, and so many other things that all the adjectives in the world couldn't describe you.
you are without a doubt, my meghan.
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