savannah: part three

tgif indeed

did you ever have a day where everything went wrong? that's my day so far. let me demonstrate:

3am: i wake up to something wet...why am i wet? because storm freaking peed on me. yep. golden shower from the dog. suweeeeet.

6am: alarms goes off. turn it off because there is no way i'm getting up after cleaning up the pee mess for an hour in the middle of the night.

7:15am: finally decide to drag myself out of bed.

7:55am: brushing meghan's teeth and she thinks it would be funny to flick me with the toothbrush. realize moments later that there are now white spots all over my dark brown shirt from the toothpaste. too late to change.

8:00am: leave the house.

8:15am: realize as i'm leaving meghan's school that i don't have my keys. did i lock them in my car? go on mad hunt for the keys. turns out i left them in the bathroom when i was helping meghan.

8:30am: decide to treat myself to a bagel because it's been a rough morning. guy at register things it's freaking HIGHlarious to put my debit card in his pocket and pretend that he gave it back to me. he said he just wanted to make me laugh. haha fuck you. mission accomplished.

8:35am: in the parking lot of the bagel store, drop my orange juice and it explodes. super.

8:45am: finally get in to work and almost everyone is out sick. excellent.

it's going to be a long day...

2:43am

this is what time i get shaken awake by my girl.

shake. "psst. mama." shake. "are you awake?"

well, I am now!

so i ask her what's wrong and she says there's a noise in her room.

i go in there and hear nothing but her wall clock ticking.

i ask her if that's the noise she hears. no.

i listen intently, half asleep.

"you hear that, mama?"

what in the world is she talking about? i think she's dreaming or imagining things.

then i realize - she's talking about the croaking of the frogs outside.

i tell her it's just frogs and to go back to bed.

she says to me, "don't they know i'm trying to sleep?"

oh, she's so my girl. i just love her so much.

so i tuck her in and get her pink puppy to snuggle.

as she's falling back to sleep, she says sleepily, "mama, those can't be frogs...they aren't saying ribbit."

oh, my girl.

fitbit ROCKS!!

so the ceo of fitbit, james, saw my last post about losing my beloved fitbit in savannah. joey, james and the fitbit team have offered to replace my fitbit tracker at no cost, which is something that they don't do on a regular occasion.

but i really loved my fitbit and it motivates me to get off my butt and move more. i love tracking my sleep and almost see it as a challenge to try and get better sleep quality because of this little device.

i have lost weight, but more importantly, i'm moving more because i like to see that little flower grow and all of the charts saying that i'm very active.

even my girl likes to get in on the action and asks to press the button to see the flower glow. (though i'm not handing it over - she has to do it while it's clipped on me, i'm that protective of it!)

so in short, this company is great - seriously, i was speechless. it means so much to me. thanks fitbit!! :)

i left my heart (and fitbit) in savannah...

so we're back to the grind and back from savannah.

savannah. oh, savannah. you have my heart and soul (food).

but i was happy to be home. because my girl is a big chunk of my heart and without her...well, no where is home without her.

and, because the cosmic universe thinks it's funny to kick my ass sometimes, i lost my fitbit in savannah.

i waited for three frickin months for that fitbit.

i had it for three frickin weeks. and now it's gone.

so because my husband is super awesome and not at all judgy like i am, he ordered another one for me online while i pouted in the hotel room.

and that's one of the reasons we are soul mates.

not because he gives me things.

it's because he understands how important little things are to me.

but i digress.

it's good to be home.

where meghan kicked sean out of our bed and onto the couch so she could sleep with her mama. i think she missed me just a little bit. as evidenced by the million hugs and kisses i got all night.

but at around 3am, meghan rolled off my bed and onto yoda in his bed.

i hear crying so i go over there and meghan's laying on top of yoda on her back and asking why Yoda is under her.

Yoda was asking (with his eyes of course) why there is a 32 pound toddler on top of him.

ah, there's no place like home.

Untitled

i debated writing about this on my blog.

it's sad and this blog is about being zen and content.

and this is anything but zen and content.

but it's important. and it's what i'm feeling right now. and i feel the need to write and get it out.

sean and i found out yesterday that the dear family (parents and brother0 of friends of ours were murdered execution style in their home.

we have known them for about 10 years.

they were the nicest people. i mean that. the nicest people.

they were the kind of people who would literally give you anything you asked for...which is why i don't understand why this had to happen.

i'm so sad for them. what could have been. what the family is going through. how they will never trust again. never believe again. never sleep peacefully again.

and that this was done for money. and for what? they were arrested a week later. did they think they would be rich and get far?

i feel so let down by our justice system right now. i just don't think it should be so easy to walk the streets and have your freedom when you have a past of violent behavior and murder.

why is this okay?

and what's more - i'm struggling with the "why"...why them, why now, why did this have to happen at all? where is god in all of this? why is evil allowed to exist?

i just can't wrap my brain around this. i can't.

you see this stuff on the news and it hurts because you feel for people but when it happens to people that you KNOW - it's too close. too close.

and now i'm afraid. and i feel like the wind has been knocked out of me and i haven't been able to catch my breath since we found out.

and if i'm feeling like this - who is fairly removed - what on earth are the family members going through?

i want to scream. i want to cry. i want to run. but i do none of those things.

the more upset i am about something, the busier i am. i just keep myself busy.

so i've been very productive at work. very productive at home. my house is spotless.

but this makes me want to never leave meghan's side. never. i don't want anything bad to ever happen...and now i have to leave her for 4 days. how am i going to do that?

i don't feel safe. i feel like a very innocent part of me is gone.

it's too close to home.

8.31.10

last day of august! that means tomorrow is september. i love september. not just because it's my birthday month, but because i also love the fall.

we don't have seasons that change really but i can feel it in me. i noticed that they had the halloween decorations out at sam's club and target already. i can smell the apple and cinnamon. and don't even get me started on pumpkin chai lattes.

and then it's october...which to me is the best month of them all. aside from pledge drives and all that jazz.

but today - today is still august. and i will soak up all the rest of the august-ness (yes, i just made that up) that there is.

on the agenda today:

1. 5am workout: done. check!

2. crazy busy day at work. good. makes the time go by fast.

3. tea party at work that i organized and planned for my employee's birthday. what a tuesday without a tea party?

4. only two more days until we leave for savannah. i decided to take friday off work after all. because that's how i roll.

5. spending time with my girl tonight in the garden.

a good last day of august...that's what i'm aiming for.